Went to the Family Doctors today

We talked about my back and I guess from the notes that the surgeons sent said that my back is inoperable. That they wouldn't be able to help me. Therefore my family doctor feels that another MRI wouldn't do me any good. I don't know about this I just want to be fixed but I guess they can't fix me. I have osteoarthritis at L4-5 restricting the nerves in my back causing sciatica going down my legs. The pain is something else. So my next visit is the Pain Clinic to see what they can do for me if anything. They may be able to do cortisone shots I guess, I don't know. I'm depressed and I'm trying not to let it get me down. I don't know. Is this grounds for medical euthanasia I wonder. Bit drastic I think but you are listening to someone that suffers from depression and has chronic suicidal ideations.  Well, I'm not sure what I'm going to do this evening I'm fed up and need a smoke. I'll write again tomorrow.